Celebrate Agape Day Published Feb. 7, 2013 By Desiree Ann Montenegro 27th Special Operations Wing Public Affairs Cannon Air Force Base, N.M. -- Have you ever wondered what the root of the word love is? The word love goes back to the beginning of the English language as early as the 18th century, with its meaning far-stretching from desire to pleasure. In its contemporary form, love can be generally defined as tender feelings of affection for someone else. One day out of the year is specifically designated to celebrate love and all it means to us as well as our significant others. This love celebration is Valentine's Day - what Saint Valentine would have called Agape, a Greek word meaning divine, unconditional, self-sacrificing, active and thoughtful love. Valentine's Day originated in 3rd century ancient Rome. One legend contends that Saint Valentine was a Catholic priest who was martyred for defying Emperor Claudius's ban on marriage. The legend continues to explain that against fear of death and punishment, Saint Valentine continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret. Since then, every year in the middle of February, we celebrate Valentine's Day to commemorate the anniversary of Saint Valentine's death and his valiant actions to make it possible for all to experience love. Valentine's Day is yet another opportunity to gain a refreshed perspective of life, love and happiness. Yet, in some cases we tend to concentrate more on the commercialism of the holiday rather than its true meaning. Generally, when you ponder how to celebrate this holiday, two approaches come to mind - commercial or sentimental. Ask yourself which approach would most honor Saint Valentine and his ultimate sacrifice. This year is the first time my husband and I will not be spending Valentine's Day together. The reason is we are living in two different states because of work. He works in California and I work at Cannon Air Force Base, N.M. The geographical separation can be difficult at times, however, we are more in love than we have ever been. When I think of our first Valentine's Day, I remember Agape because that is what my husband called it when he first explained to me how deeply in love he was. That confession was followed by an intricately planned day of surprises that ended with a marriage proposal - a day I will never forget. One such surprise included a necklace custom made and inlaid with rubies, my birth stone, so that I would always be reminded that we were born to love each other. My husband also made a reservation at a restaurant located on the top floor of one of the highest building in San Diego, CA. As I looked upon the ocean view admiring the ambience and attention paid to such an experience, I realized my fiancé was looking at me with what could be best explained as a piercing gaze. I should have known then that we would hold each other's hearts for a lifetime. Agape day reminds me that as a Department of Defense civilian, a woman and a wife, love means so much more than flowers or candy. I choose this year to honor love, my husband and Saint Valentine by vowing to never forget to tell my husband "I Agape you always and forever Alex Vincent Montenegro II." This Valentine's Day, take the time to stop and look at your loved ones and simply express to them with all the words you can manage how much they mean to you and how you appreciate having them in your life. When we stop and realize just how many special people we have that care for us dearly, we can begin to see ourselves through their eyes. Happy Valentine's Day; don't forget to love yourself the way others do. To honor and publically give thanks to their significant others, Air Commandos and DoD civilians were asked how they have been able to creatively keep their relationship together in the midst of all of life's trials. "Love is a loaded word and it isn't one I give out very often. For me to truly express love for another, is me making myself fully vulnerable to that person. Love is constant effort and work between two people who have made a commitment to be there for each other, through thick and thin, no matter what. For the past several months, a deployment has separated my babe and I, but we have made every effort to remind each other how much we love and support one another literally every day. Communication is key to a successful relationship, along with being honest and open about individual feelings and needs. If you are reading this babe... just know that I love you and miss you very much... always! Happy Valentine's Day." - Senior Airman Alexxis Pons Abascal, 27th Special Operations Wing Public Affairs "Some of the ways that my spouse and I have been able to creatively keep our relationship together is through telephone calls, e-mails, FaceTime and weekend visits. For Valentine's Day, we'll probably send each other a funny card." - Capt. Erin A Roscio, 27th Special Operations Communication Squadron Plans Flight "Communication-I take the time every day to call and talk and see how her day is going and send a text almost every day to remind her that I love her. I was single for 16 years and waited for God's timing to bring me the right person, and he did. She is everything I prayed for. And more! God still answers prayers and she is that living proof."- Scott Wetzel, 27th Special Operations Comptroller Squadron When I was deployed, my husband and I really enjoyed Skype, but I loved the letters that we wrote to each other. Skype lasted for about fifteen minutes, but the letters last forever. If I had a bad day or just wanted something familiar to remind me of him, I would go to the letters that he wrote me. They always put a smile on my face or made my heart skip a beat. It seems like we have switched roles and I am doing all the deploying. I thank God for putting you in my life and making me stronger in every walk of life. You are a wonderful husband, father, friend and leader. I love you always Master Sgt. Marvin Wallace."- Tech. Sgt. Yolanda Wallace, 27th Special Operations Wing Chapel "Our religious faith keeps our relationship strong. We put God first and everything else falls into place. You don't marry the person you can live with - you marry the person who you cannot live without. Thanks for a wonderful thirty-three years Anita Lafuente."- Jose Lafuente, 27th Special Operations Force Support Squadron "My husband and I maintain our marriage with daily communication. My husband had to PCS without me and the kids, so he calls me almost every day and we talk about his day and my night since we are on different time schedules. During the day, we text each other until he goes to bed. Every night I send him a text with a rundown of what happened that day with the kids. I think that helps him feel connected and we still consult each other with decisions regarding our family. We also Skype so he can see the kids on the weekends. When I've had a stressful day or work week, he sends me flowers and simply says I love you. I think we say we love you to each other more now that he's away than before. No matter what, we at least say I love you to end conversations so if something were to happen to either of us, we would know that those were the last words we told each other." - Tech. Sgt. Kenya Howard, 27th Special Operations Wing Equal Opportunity